The Irishman | Blogging a dead horse

Blogging a dead horse

Is a barrel of naked monkeys more fun than a barrel of hairy ones?

The Irishman

Martin Scorsese's movie, THE IRISHMAN, has had rave reviews and is up for lots of awards. And yet, my Facebook feed has plenty of people who are not quite so impressed.

“Does that Dino guy look like an…”
“The Flinstone’s Pet?” “Flinstone? You some kind of comedian? Flin-fucking Yabadoo… Listen… Dinero, actor guy. Does he look Irish to you? I mean, Irish and speaking Italian to what’s his name, Danny Devito…”
“In the Irishman! Scorsese movie! You gotta listen to me. And I’m asking you…”
“Danny DeVito’s not in The Irishman!”
“Well, whoever he is, he looked just as old as Dinero and kept calling him Kid! I mean…”
“They used special FX…
“Yeah, so special, you couldn’t see the fucking difference! And the critics are raving.”
“Well, it is what it is."
“Oh yeah, what the fuck does that mean?”
“Scorsese’s obviously connected, knows people who know people you know what I mean? And they phone around, say a few things, make a few suggestions as to how the critics should conduct themselves…”
“Pity they didn’t make a few suggestions to his fucking editor. How long was that thing? I mean, it’s about Hoffa, right? So when’s he turn up? Halfway through the fucking the film, with some stupid haircut, and and, he repeats himself... “
“Repeats himself?”
“Yeah, repeats himself. And everyone else repeats everything…”
“Repeat, well, it’s a style…”
“You know, like how they talked then. These people. You know…”
“I know what? What you saying?”
“Just saying… And well you know, they kill him.”
“Tired of him fucking repeating himself all the fucking time and then… what do we get? We get the old guys getting older…”
“Special FX again.”
“Don't give me that! They just took their fucking make up off! And then they died.”
“Dino doesn’t.”
“Danny DeVito does and he looks in better shape. What the fuck is that about?”
“It’s just a movie. Fuggetabout it.”
“Fuggetaabout it… If I was Italian I’d be fucking…”
“He was an Irishman!”
“Yeah, sure! When's he ever say, "Begorrah!" When did he drink Guiness? When did he ever sound like anything other than a stereotyped Italian Gangster?”
“He ordered a green coffin!”
“That makes him fucking colour blind, not Irish.”
“It is what it is.”
“What’s that?”
“A movie that er, has a lot of old friends in and they just like working with each other and the investors probably said, we don’t give a fuck what it’s about, just put my money on the screen, and so, there they are. For three and a half hours.”
"Is that what it is?"
"Yeah. It's what it is."